“Rather than waiting for the next opportunity, the one in your hands is the opportunity. Said another way, the grass is greener where you water it.” -Benjamin P. Hardy
How often do you hear someone say that their life would be a whole better if they just had “X”?
That they just need more money, more time, more experience, or something else that’s beyond themselves in order to finally start living the life they know they should?
Really, you could say that would be describing 95% of the population, right?
According to Brendon Burchard, author of The Millionaire Messenger, most people’s lives are much like a field of half-dug holes.
They grab a shovel and begin digging in the search happiness, wealth, and fulfillment. However, after a period of not seeing any results, they become disillusioned and move onto another spot.
The result? Most people are constantly busy, exhausted, never truly satisfied, and always looking for another set of circumstances.
The Problem Isn’t Your Circumstances. The Problem is You
“It is your decisions, not your conditions, that determine your destiny.” -Tony Robbins
Your current conditions are nothing more than a reflection of you. As James Allen has said, “Your circumstances reveal you to yourself.”
Indeed, everything in your life right now is there because you’ve allowed it. Your external conditions are simply an outward manifestation of your internal reality.
If you want something different, then hold yourself to a different standard. Until your change decisions and consequently who you are, your circumstances won’t. To quote Darren Hardy,
“To achieve what you have not, you must become what you are not. You have to grow into your goals.”
This really isn’t rocket science: Things don’t change, you change.
Your schedule doesn’t suddenly get cleared up. Instead, you must put tighter barriers on how you use your time. You don’t start making more money and suddenly become rich. Instead, you must develop new money habits.
Any exceptions to the rule, generally aren’t improvements, or won’t be permanent.
For example, most lottery winners quickly return to their poverty after having become overnight millionaires — their circumstance changed, but they didn’t change who they were, and thus, old patterns persisted.
To that, Jim Rohn wisely quipped, “It is hard to keep that which has not been obtained through personal development.”
Hence, you must be the change you wish to see in your world. Until you become the person who creates your dreams, then you’re simply delusional.
Surround Yourself with People Who Hold You to a Higher Standard than You Hold Yourself
“Don’t join an easy crowd; you won’t grow. Go where the expectations and the demands to perform are high.” -Jim Rohn
According to what psychologists call, “The Pygmalion Effect,” you’re either rising or falling to the expectations and demands of those around you.
Hence, if you are going to change your life by changing your circumstances, then you need to put yourself into a situation that literally forces you to rise up.
You need to put yourself around people who aren’t afraid to tell it to you straight.
You need people in your life who are going to constantly humble and inspire you to be more than currently are.
Until you do, you’ll always be left wondering who you could have become.
As Benjamin P. Hardy has said,
“Your level of talent and “potential” are irrelevant if you’re surrounded by people who don’t help you realize it. We all know many people who have unfulfilled potential. Don’t let that be you.”
Everything you want in life is available to you; there are no limits. Once you decide what you want and how big you’re willing to play, you can be as successful as you choose to be.
Thus, it’s time to stop blaming your circumstances and instead, create the conditions that you want.
If you do not believe that you have the power to choose your own way, then you have an external locus of control and will remain a victim of circumstances until you claim personal responsibility.
Of course, this is not a fun way to live. However, you can change your mind at any moment you so decide.
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